My Social Media-less Life

Shoutout to all the people who will get the obscure reference that is this post’s title. 😉

I’m not really sure how it happened. Maybe it’s because I turned 35 a few weeks ago. But I’ve really been thinking about the passage time.

As Kamala Harris once said, “There is such a great significance to the passage of time when we think about a day in the life of our children.”

And lately, I’ve really been feeling that kind of way about things, especially in regard to the children in my life, specifically my nephews and niece. My oldest nephew is 9 years old.

Nine.

And I think realizing that fact made me actually fall into a bit of a depression of sorts, where once I go home for the day, I do very little in the way of productivity. For the first time in actual years, I ran out of clean underwear. I’ve also been staying up until 2am or later most nights just because I don’t want “tomorrow” to be here.

The reason I say a “depression of sorts” is because it doesn’t feel like a full-on depressive episode. Aside from having some extra crunch on the workdays because of trips and clients needing the occasional deep clean, my days have been pretty good during the workday. I’ve been listening to the Gospels being read and Christian/uplifting podcasts more than usual, my mom and I have been having some good laughs… it’s been pretty decent. In fact, the month of May has even gone much faster than it usually does.

But then I go home for the day. Granted, some days are later than others, but if I don’t do something productive before I get on YouTube, then YouTube is all I’m doing for the night.

The extreme solution would be to give up YouTube completely. But I’ve grown since I deleted the usual social media; a good solid YouTube fast and asking for a few friends’ help will suffice for the time being. And I’ve already begun that process. If it doesn’t, we’ll reconsider our options.

If you’re over the age of 25, do you remember when you hit 25 and suddenly you had an early-adult life crisis and asked yourself, “What am I doing with my life?”

Apparently it’s a thing at 35 too. But much more quickly, because my brain’s been done developing for 10 years now.

As previously stated, my oldest nephew is 9 years old. Between his ages of 0 and 5, I would go hang out at his house every week. It was a fun way for me to hang out with him and his parents as he grew up.

And then they moved multiple times and I started to get “busier”… and now they go see Grandma (my mom) a lot because they live less than a 10-minute drive from her house… but Auntie doesn’t always make an appearance, either at their house or at Grandma’s while they’re there.

A client’s husband asked me today if I go see my nephews and niece often since they obviously don’t live that far and I said maybe twice a month if we can coordinate schedules. But the thing is…

Family is the most important thing… and they’re not small forever.

My 9-year-old nephew is into riding bicycles right now. “Why don’t you bring your bike the next time you come, Auntie?”

You know what? I will pack it in my car and keep it there at this point. Because if I don’t seize the day now, when am I ever going to?

Seizing the day isn’t about having the time. It’s about making the time.

You would think I would’ve learned this lesson at 25, but sometimes you have to be slapped in the face with your oldest nephew being NINE before you can fully understand the gravity of the situation.

I just pray that I can keep this lesson fresh in my mind always. Not just tonight.